From the monthly archives:

May 2010

Renee ZellweGRR

May 27, 2010

Renée Zellweger: she’s always squinting, am I right? For years now; just like every other person with working eyeballs (who, unlike some successful actresses with a penchant for unflatteringly harsh bob haircuts, occasionally allow them to rise to the surface of our skulls), I have been wishing that Renée Zellweger would open her eyes more. [...]

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…Or a Vogon.

May 19, 2010

After holding the title of Weirdest Conversation I’ve Ever Had for nearly six months, the unrelenting woman revealed to be Tracey has had her crown snatched from her snappish head by someone new. This is an actual phone conversation I had today. The ALL CAPS text you see isn’t just for formatting. The man spoke [...]

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Not Enough Gays In The Week

May 17, 2010

This weekend saw not one, but two gay rights rallies being held in Melbourne. On the same day. One was for gay marriage rights; one appeared to be a generic rally against homophobia (which, really: It’s a good thing all homophobes are ignorant and stupid, otherwise they’d have the forethought to assemble when we’re all [...]

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Defending Your Right To Say It

May 4, 2010

It’s not often that I get opinionated in anything even remotely resembling a serious fashion, but this whole Logies/Wil Anderson/Catherine Deveny thing is just getting on my nerves. First of all, (and this explains why I said “getting on my nerves” and not “I’M SO INCENSED” or “I WANT TO OVERTURN A VEHICLE!”) I don’t [...]

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Cosmo Hates Your Penis

May 2, 2010

You know when you see old people shout back at the television when they see something that makes them angry, and you kind of shake your head at them because oh, old people are just so silly? I’m about to go one better. I am going to shout back at a magazine. The magazine in question [...]

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